Thursday, December 15, 2011

A Rare Snuggle

Here is a question of nature vs. nurture...My son does not snuggle. Is this just who he is or because we never had him crawl into bed with us when he was teeny tiny for an afternoon nap or early morning snooze? I can't quite figure it out, but I'm leaning toward nature because, quite honestly, the child has rarely ever been able to sit still, even from Day One (and before, if my ribs remember correctly!). Even when he is going to sleep, he is moving. With Moo Cow and Monkey at his side, he reaches one arm up so he can twirl the hair on the top of his head and he chews/rolls his tongue around in his mouth; at least that is what he has been doing lately when I put him down for his daily afternoon nap (attempt). He also wants to be way, way covered up with his Thomas comforter, so much so that I worry he'll pull the blanket completely over his head when I turn to leave! But with all of these little routines, the closest thing I ever get to a snuggle is having him sit in my lap to read books before bed. Granted, I do get lots of smooches, especially when he's stalling, but HD has just never been a big hugger.

You can imagine my surprise today, then, when he reached up to wrap both arms around my neck as I sang our goodnight song to him prior to nap. "Mama, Mama," he kept saying, and he just wanted to sit there with his arms holding me close. It was so very sweet. At one point I closed my eyes and just held on back, trying to let the moment wash over me. These are the moments that I need to remember when I'm ready to tear my hair out because he's not listening or just threw something at me (again). These are the moments that demonstrate just how much he does care. These are the moments that make the struggles and sacrifices worthwhile, because honestly, I'm not sure if there is any better feeling than having your child pull you close just because they don't want to let you go.

When we have our bad days, I tell myself, "He won't be two forever." But today, I had the same thought run my head and it made me a little sad becuase he won't always want to wrap his arms around my neck and hold me tight. So I'm doing my best to relish in this snuggle because I know just how precious it is on so very many levels.

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